Martial arts and action films are known for being light on depth with audiences generally more interested in non-stop action, but for a big budget Hollywood pic like CHARLIE’S ANGEL: FULL THROTTLE to blow $120 million on what amounts to a 106-minute highlight reel is frightening. Directed by MTV graduate McG, the film blasts through one preposterous hi-octane scene after the other while each of the main actors are filmed like, well, rock stars in a music video. In keeping with the latest trends in mainstream Hollywood action, CGI effects and wire-fu dominate. There is certainly a lot to see, but whether any of it is worth seeing remains the big question.
Expecting the film to be every bit as vacuous as its predecessor, I couldn’t help but smile during the film’s opening scene. The first face to appear was none other than the action director and co-star of many old school kung fu classics, Yuen Cheung-yan (also brother of Yuen Wo-ping). Better still, he is credited as the “Deranged Mongol,” a fitting name to go with an actor associated with some of kung fu cinema’s most deranged characters. Being reminded that a master of the genre was getting a well deserved piece of this exorbitant pie, no matter how tasteless it may be, I was content to endure a ride through one of the dumbest action films since TANGO AND CASH.
Let’s break it down. CHARLIE’S ANGELS: FULL THROTTLE is part two in the film franchise based on the hit TV series that ran from 1976 through 1981, featuring three lovely ladies as crime-fighting agents headed by the mysterious Charlie who forever gives directions out of a little speaker box. Their only human contact is Charlie’s assistant Bosley, played this time by comedian Bernie Mac who still appears to be in his McDonald’s spokesman mode.
Their mission is to investigate the murder of several people in a witness protection program. The crimes eventually lead to an Irish mob leader and former boyfriend of fellow Angel Dylan Sanders (Drew Barrymore). Ultimately they discover that a former Angel played by Demi Moore is behind the deaths and a plot to get a hold of two government-encoded rings. The Angels don disguises, decipher clues and break out the kung fu action to stop her.
This film is an over-inflated, pop culture leech that on the surface has it all; attractive and in demand stars like Cameron Diaz and Luke Wilson, a number of cameos including Pink and those insidious Olsen Twins, a range of hot rods past and present, ultra-slick production values, wild stunts, and a saucy Lucy Liu with a whip in hand. The three leading ladies exude a lot of energy and appear to give it their all in each scene.
Demi Moore is rather well-suited as an action villain with her chiseled body. Once again, Crispin Glover steals the show with his perversely fun portrayal of the slick-haired mute with a cane sword and a fetish for hair who is simply known as the Thin Man. Justin Theroux also deserves mention for having some of the best abs yet seen on film. But his Lucky Charms accent is silly as is the tough guy routine. The rest of the supporting cast is just as poorly used as in the previous film. Bernie Mac is not funny and I’ll leave it at that. Matt LeBlanc and Luke Wilson both share the same trait, they have no personality. Monty Python alumni John Cleese probably needed the money, but there is no reason for him to be in this film as Lucy Liu’s father. He’s not funny either and I hate to see comedy legends publicly deteriorate in throwaway roles.
The martial arts action is thinly spread throughout the film and most of the standard wire harness tricks are in play. There is no fight highlight to compare with Barrymore’s frivolous, yet fun chair scene in the previous film. Horribly clichéd rooftop brawls with obvious green screen backdrops as Diaz and Moore go at each other in a series of quick edits that glaze over the whole thing will illicit no cheers from genre fans. Despite Yuen’s noble efforts, McG is clearly not concerned with filming anything resembling a decent fight that has any impact. Like the rest of the film, he appears content to skim the surface for flashy money shots that would certainly look impressive in a highlight reel, but become hollow and tedious when they’re filling an entire film already struggling with a mediocre plot.
The stunt work is like a live-action cartoon, which unfortunately is where most Hollywood action films have gone including the James Bond franchise. Asking the viewer to accept that the Angels could careen off a 2-mile high dam with a military vehicle and climb into an inactive helicopter, and fly away safely is an insult. Later, Demi Moore actually soars about like a flying squirrel with nothing but a billowy cape.
Meanwhile, McG is lauded on the DVD release for his attention to detail on using specific car models. If only he had paid similar attention to the action scenes.
FULL THROTTLE is a pricey byproduct of an alarming trend in filmmaking where producers believe that audiences will stay enraptured by their film if they simply build up enough visual momentum. In the past, this method has typically been applied to commercials and music videos, but with directors of those mediums moving to feature film and drawing on video games or old TV shows for inspiration, they are bringing this style to the big screen and it generally doesn’t work. As an action film, FULL THROTTLE is all glamour and no guts. Yet, mass marketing is written all over this film and with its star power and sharp looks, it begs to be seen. But you’ll be hard-pressed to remember any of it afterwards.
Fans of butt-kicking women should check out the superior action in Corey Yuen’s equally slick Hong Kong flick SO CLOSE.
by Mark Pollard
